Sep 10, 2014

GIVING IS RECEIVING

Assalamualaikum.

I've been contemplating so much about myself. Did I give enough? Is it worth it having to trouble myself by giving something I love/should have to certain people?

It's been almost 2 years that I've been working. One more month and genaplah 2 tahun. Working equals to having my own income/more financial responsibilities. And the one thing I realised is that whenever I am being too calculative about how much money I should give to my parents this month, I become very sengkek that month. Like instant karma gitu. Whenever I feel happy about nothing to be paid (except for the usuals) at certain months, I'd give my parents more.

Ini bukan entri nak membongkak membongak kau tau. Cuma nak cakap, setiap kali aku berkira-kira, selalu budget lari though I've been doing meticulous budgeting bulan tu. TAPI, bila bagi lebih dari apa aku niat, rasa Ya Allah seronoknya lapangnya dada indahnya dunia. Wallahi. MasyaAllah, macam tu sekali Allah bagi kita rasa bila niat nak bagi parents happy. (Harapnya happy la abah ye haha)

Niat nak bagi sesuatu kat parents aku bukan sebab they can't afford to have it on their own. Gaji mereka berkali ganda dari kita yang baru kerja ni wuwuwu nangis. It's purely for the sake of happiness. As in bagoih la anak aku dah kerja dah mampu tolong dari aspek belanja rumah for a week. Jadilahhh. Tak sia-sia hantaq pi ngaji dulu. Korang rasa tak keindahan memberi tu? Rasa macam you gain more instead of losing something? Rasa tak? We can never describe the feeling kan.

You know what I mean???

Sometimes aku rasa kalau nak train diri dari aspek memberi tu, better start dari kalangan family. Bagi kat adik-adik yang sekolah ke, mak bapak yang tak harap anak bagi banyak tapi asal bagi ke, atok nenek yang nak buat duit bagi sepupu-sepupu kau yang kecik ke (ehem atok nenek aipp!), or a friend in need. Yang betul-betul memerlukan for emergencies yang masuk akal. Bukan untuk nak-online-shopping-tapi-tengah-sengkek-pinjam-duit-kau-dulu-lah kind of friend no no no.

Lepas tu barulah boleh join mana-mana NGO and help in raising funds for Gaza ke mana ke. Sebab sometimes nampak yang gigih menjulang tabung bantuan Gaza tu, tak contribute pun kat komuniti terdekat diorang like what I've been seeing since the Gaza-Israel affairs. Is that a right thing to do? Macam pepatah Melayu kera di hutan disusukan, anak di rumah mati kelaparan. Mohon aku tak jadi macam apa yang aku kurang setuju Ya Allah.

Bukan nak kata donating tu not good, donate and do anything and everything we can to help them of course, tapi adakah innerself kita and people around us especially family sendiri terbela. Amboi serius plop bunyi but that what makes me rethink about myself. Adakah aku dah cukup memberi untuk ibu bapa sendiri yang dah memberi lebih dari apa yang sepatutnya. Adakah aku mampu nak bagi pertolongan lebih besar untuk umat Islam luar sana. InsyaAllah, mula dengan pemberian kecik dulu, mungkin satu hari boleh beri yang lebih besar.

Moga Allah mencukupi segala yang both my parents, family and friends need.

Tu jelah. Okay bye :)