Oct 24, 2013

FAT AND MISERABLE PART II

Assalamualaikum.

Recently, one of my close friend told me that someone asked her,

"Eh bukan ke dia tu yang blablabla tu? Hidup lagi rupanya ek."

Upon hearing, I was like, wow, tak boleh straight forward lagi ke cik adik?

Maybe sebab dia taw cerita 3 tahun lepas tu and was shocked to see me when she thought I was already dead.

Ya, akak masih hidup dik. Ya, akak survive kejadian tu. Tak mati lagi. Yang adik nampak hari tu, bukan jelmaan roh atau imaginasi adik. Memang akak la yang berjalan depan adik tu. Sebab takde kot jelmaan roh yang pergi merayau jual tudung kan?

This makes me realize that people still talk about it walaupun dah lama cerita tu habis. It was 3 years ago.

Aku? Tak mungkin dapat lupa. It's embedded in my mind forever. I could only suppress the memory for a while, but when it comes back, I feel so depressed. But there's nothing I can do about the past. Hanya boleh cuba untuk lupa and tahan apa orang cakap. After all, puncanya dari aku, bukan orang lain.

But after these few years, the depression lessen. No more psychiatrist, no more councelling, no more weird stares from people regarding the incident.

Now I'm in a new surrounding with new people with differrent attitude  hehe. New issues la pulak kan. But so far so good. So far. So faaarrrr...

Hopefully orang tak hanya pandang cerita buruk pasal aku sama ada betul atau tak, but tolong la tahu yang aku sedang mencari the light at the end of the tunnel. Tak perlu la nak menabur fitnah melampau sangat sampai tertutup ruang untuk aku bernafas, untuk aku nampak jalan depan. Please, manusia.

Coz you know what they say, if you don't have anything nice to say, lebih baik diam.

...to be continued...